Let me tell you a little something about how hopeless I was just a little over a year ago. I had spent 4 years at home with my kids, homeschooling them. Every material thing I had was because of the career my husband had. At this time, he was being inconsistent and living a double …
Ugh, there are so many things that I hate about this single life; Yet there is so much that I enjoy. I hate that I feel like I need a man here at night just to make me feel safe. I hate that I feel like I need him here to get some real sleep. I …
Have you noticed that the familiarity of your discomfort is easier to stay in than to step out into the change that God has called you to?
Loving yourself seems to be a taboo subject in some Christian circles. I understand because when I first learned of the notion to love myself, I kind of scoffed, like, that isn’t godly. It’s because my eyes weren’t opened to the truth of it. All I could see was narcissistic love, being a lover of …
Single Mama, I know it doesn’t seem fair and it can get lonely but I want you to know that you are not alone! 5:45 a.m. My alarm goes off, I need to get up because this is my only quiet time with God. Drag my feet into my office (on a good day when I don’t press “snooze” instead) open up my Bible and journal some prayers.
“The biggest thing I fell into was planning every detail of how I could kill myself without hurting the baby I was carrying in my womb. I was a high suicide risk and I didn’t tell anyone except the one person who I wanted to care… and he didn’t…”
“Emotional abuse, this can be the hardest to spot and the hardest to explain. They can be serial cheaters, controlling under the guise of trying to “protect you”, they play mind games, constantly lie, make you question your own reality…”
“In the midst of this I became pregnant and went through the most emotionally painful and lonely pregnancy of my life. But this child kept me living”
I lived off of the highs of our relationship and the highs of weed. But when I hit the lows, they were SO LOW. Nothing kept me happy, nothing rid me of the deep pain inside. I attempted suicide 3 times by overdosing on different medications. Thanks to God, it wasn’t my time to go.
I couldn’t wrap my mind around the thought of being worth more than rubies when my husband couldn’t even see it. Was I mistaken? Did I need to perform more perfectly as a wife? Did I need to change my shy, reserved nature to be more like his extrovert mistress? No… none of that was the answer.